
Paul tells the Philippians to be like Jesus, and so we tell our parishioners
to be like Jesus too. They expect that. It's a given.
But I think deep down, there are many of us who would often rather be like
Chuck Norris. It's a guilty little desire, and it's definitely real.
Have you come across Chuck Norris jokes? Here's a sampling that the church
secretary and I have been chuckling over:
Chuck Norris doesn't sleep, he waits.
Chuck Norris can win a game of Monopoly without owning any property.
There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris
allows to live.
In an average living room, there are 1242 objects Chuck Norris could use to
kill you, including the room itself.
Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
Chuck Norris can delete the Recycle Bin.
Bill Gates lives in constant fear that Chuck Norris's PC will crash.
Chuck Norris can build a snowman out of rain.
Chuck Norris can play a violin with a piano.
The last digit of pi is Chuck Norris. He is the end of all things.
When an episode of Walker Texas Ranger aired in France, they surrendered to
Chuck Norris just to be on the safe side.
Chuck Norris can do a wheelie on a unicycle.
Chuck Norris makes onions cry.
Chuck Norris got his driver's license at the age of 16 seconds.
Chuck Norris is the only man ever to defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.
When Chuck Norris jumps into a body of water, he doesn't get wet. The water
gets Chuck Norris instead.
Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.
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